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The Energy of Grief

Uncategorized Jan 18, 2023

I've had an awareness this week that the grief is lifting.

Many of you know that my dear husband passed away at the end of June. It's now been six months since he has passed on to his next great adventure. You also know I've been very open about his experience with the fourth stage cancer as well as my grieving beginning while he was still alive and, especially, in the end stages of his life when he was in hospice.

So what I want to speak into is the energy of grief, and what it is feeling like for me as it is lifting. I have a couple of things I want to talk about. One is the stages of grief, and the other is my energetic experience with it.

Let's talk a moment about Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. She did great research and her book On Death and Dying came out in 1969. It was revolutionary, where people found out that grieving was a normal emotional process that they could go through. Now, this has been in my lifetime. I can tell you how powerful that has been, as a part of the consciousness to understand grief as a process. She originally had five stages of grief, they are

  1. denial
  2. anger
  3. bargaining
  4. depression
  5. acceptance

There's no timeline on this and there's no specific order in which they have to happen. My experience is it's more a cluster of emotions - that all of these are available to us.

In the early stages, it looks more like shock and denial. And as we move through the stages, or the logical expansion, of our energetic experience with grief. I like to think about it that way because it feels like we are expanding energetically through the process. We move from denial into anger, where the anger actually is a frequency of a level of consciousness that gives us the ability to move and to make decisions.

Then we expand from anger into bargaining and that can feel feel like guilt and shame and anxiety. From there we move into depression. That part is tough, the sadness, despair, helplessness, hopelessness, feeling of overwhelm. Then we expand into acceptance. That's where I have found feelings of courage, validation, self compassion, wisdom, pride in myself, and gratefulness. I'm grateful that I'm able to work through this and experience these different levels of consciousness. It's a way I like to speak about it, instead of only the stages of grief.

My experience has been of this as energy - as you know, everything is energy with me.  As energy, there has been a lifting of the heaviness, of the suffocation, that was there early on. It felt like I couldn't take a full breath, or I just still couldn't even believe that it was happening even though I knew it was.

I was in the end stages of life with Jim for a long time before he passed over. So as this energy that I experienced as grief worked through these different stages, I was very aware of when it felt like denial; and when it felt like anger because I was pretty angry; and then bargaining, depression and acceptance.

Elizabeth Kübler-Ross has added two other stages from her original work: shock and testing. I've also experienced those as well, but I'm keeping it simple with the five original stages for now. Those stages were observed in people who were grieving through as their loved ones experienced a terminal illness so it was more appropriate to my journey. 

My parents actually met Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, who did this groundbreaking research and wrote the book, On Death and Dying. They met her right after we lost my brother in a car accident in 1978 within 10 years of her work being published. It was a life-changing experience for them, because they were able to buy her book and to better plan, or have an awareness of, their grieving journey. And to feel like they weren't losing their minds, which is pretty much what it feels like if you don't have an idea that grief is a process.

It's a real life experience you're having, that the human population has, when someone dies or something else that they grieve whether it's the loss of a human, or the loss of a job, or the loss of a dream. We do need to grieve the loss of a dream. 

This is a lot of great understanding about grief that we can bring into our conscious awareness. Thereby better understanding what we are feeling in these emotions that are coming up from a subconscious level.  Once something comes into our awareness, we can work with it. And if it are not in our awareness yet, we can use True-for-You Testing to bring it forward. That brings it into our awareness so we can work with it and use energy technologies on it.

As you can imagine, I've used every energy technology in the book to work through this grief: to honor it; to process it; to experience it; and, to have it be sacred. It's been very sacred - my experience with my grieving process.

What has happened in the last week is that I have felt the heaviness lifting. It was through an awareness that I had been very productive for the last 10 days. I was like I had been back in 2019 and 2020, before Jim got so sick. I looked back over the last 10 days and thought, "Huh, that's kind of the old me. That's the more high-functioning, really alert, get-it-done, Connie. She's been buried under grief."

I could see that I could look back and have the awareness that the grief was lifting because I've been very consciously processing it.  I must be in the state of acceptance, this consciousness of acceptance, because the heaviness is not there. And I've been thinking about it as one of those weighted blankets, and probably one in a dark color, maybe like a dark grey or a navy blue because it was a really dark feeling. And it was very heavy. And maybe I bought one that was too heavy, I should have bought one that was 12 pounds, and I bought one that was heavier, and I felt pinned down by it. That's kind of what the grief felt like.

As that heaviness has lifted I have felt me expanding back out more into my natural state that has more joy. Yes, joy and peace. Acceptance is a good word right here. So is expansion; I have felt more expansion. And I have felt more compassion for everyone that's around me. It's not like the grief is using up all of my emotional bandwidth.

It's like I have that bandwidth back available for the others around me and for the collective consciousness and for humankind in general. It feels very good to be where I am and to have this awareness as the energy of grief is lifting up and away.

I know I'm not complete with the grieving process. I don't know that we ever are when we've lost people that were such a big part of our life. And that's okay too, because it's the human experience.

I'm Connie Kean with Quantum Energy Infusion where Everything is Energy!

Want to increase your bandwidth? Book an Energy Breakthrough Session with Connie to discover one way to increase your energy. 


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